Saturday, December 27, 2008

so much for good will toward men

Edit- Feodora did the right thing by asking people to stop being hateful and vitriolic toward Sileny, and everyone else who had a finger pointed at them in the comments, and I appreciate that. As far as I'm concerned, this is over, I hope we can all put this little scuffle in the garbage where it belongs, and let people do the things they need to do. If Feodora decides she's done blogging, that's her prerogative and it stems from something much deeper than Sileny's comment. So lets not play the blame game. Everyone in the blogging community does it because they love it. They love making discoveries and they love sharing them with you. We don't do it to try and one up each other, or have silly little blog wars, and it should never have to come to that. So lets hope for peace between everyone in the new year.

So you've probably seen Feodora's melodramatic post about not blogging anymore because Sileny asked her, nicely, to fix her post to not be so offensive to the thick girls in the audience. You would think that the random blog post on a blog which no one reads that Feo linked to would have been more offensive to her, but no, Sileny's respectful request is apparently what did it to her. So Sileny is getting some awesome hate mail thanks to Feodora, and I'm pissed. It seems like Feodora is trying to link Sileny to that blog post, which is ridiculous, all of her blogging energy goes here at L/H.

You don't have to worry about me, I'll be fine, but Sileny does awesome work for us here and inworld, and doesn't deserve a lick of what she's been getting. I hope you'll all give her love and support, because she more than anyone else, deserves it. Shame on you Feodora for trying to throw Sileny into the fire for your own problems.

As a side note, I'll try to get some stuff posted today, but I am shaking with anger at the moment, and don't have the will.


Sileny said...

Thank you for defending me wrenny pants. lub joo.

Prudence said...

I too am sad to see this happen. Feodora shouldn't have brought Sileny's name up at all let alone condone any of what is being said about her. Had anyone read what Sileny comment on the blog, it was just another comment from another reader. Nothing hateful. Sileny isn't like that and it breaks all of our hearts to see everyone be so mean to Sileny, she did nothing at all buy voice respect for all the shapely women who are in and out of SL and if that is such a bad thing to do, then to hell with the lot of you. It's not a season to back stab and manipulate, but perhaps that is what Feodora wants from her holidays.

Sileny, we love you, and those that bad mouth you weren't your friends to begin with.

Anonymous said...


I posted first on Feodora's site before coming here. Lol actually I came here first but there were no new posts and then started on my way thru all the great blogs out there.

Yesterday I saw the photos that seem to be part of all this drama. At the time there were no comments. I was too chicken to leave mine. I have since remedied that.

Being a plus size person is a tough thing to be. Some folks think its still ok to pick on this portion of the population. Really its not. Im hoping that wasn't supposed to be the case. But I just didn't get it and said as much.

Thanks you for stepping up to the plate.

Elliandra Parx

Teena Basevi said...

Sileny, your comment was a way for Feo to add to the drama train she's from the leezu mess. Your comment wasnt anything offensive or rude and for her to come out an use that was silly and pointless and just made her look foolish. It may look like she has lots of 'readers' but by reading the comments I'd bet 90% of those are the same person commenting.

You keep doin what ya do. You ladies here at Love/Hate do nice work and pfft to those that cant take an honest comment.

*blows raspberries on yer belly*

Sileny said...

/me giggles from the razzleberries

Anonymous said...

It certainly looks as though Feo is trying to shift the spotlight from her wrongdoings of abusing LeeZu's IP rights.

It's a shame Sileny is facing the force of such a large group against her. Stay strong, in the end it's the one who was in the wrong who will look a fool.

If i was LeeZu I'd have filed a DMCA as soon as i heard about that post and let Feo decide in her own banned-account time if what she did was right or wrong.

It's rather horrible to see some of the posters there badmouthing Sileny over a comment they haven't even read...

People who run these freebie, sales and fashion blogs and groups should support the creators and NOT work against them. She was clearly in the wrong here.

I certainly hope this blog doesn't close over 'drama'

- Cat

Wrenja said...

I have no intention of closing the blog over this mess. At the same time though, I can take constructive criticism and, hell, I can take straight out hate.

But if bitches want to front, they better have the goods to back it up.

Ulquiorra said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Anonymous said...

Hello ladies,

I have no idea what Feo wrote about chubby people and my idea of Leezu is somehow pointing to the free transferable Leezu dress we talked about yesterday.
I saw her give it using the group and well... I was so hoping she had asked the owner... guess that didn't happen.
Even though Feo might be dealing with Leezu owner or not I don't see it as an excuse for the overwhelming she is surely facing right now. You decide to post in public things you face the consequences.

Would I be offended of chubby people being fooled off? Very probable, but I've had worse on me and as I grow you learn to either Ignore or Learn (after deciding which is the right message being delivered) any comments.
I know how heavy it must be to be critized. Your hard work on getting freebies for people... I mean the girls on this blog and I can understand as well the girls working with Feo and she herself.
If Feo broke cause of a nervous breakdown and Sileny's remark was a drop in an already troubled ocean, I just hope Feo has the time to cool down and think things.
Unfrotunatley I have no REAL idea or PROOF of the message Sileny sent Feo so I'm just stating my opinion as best I can since the only thing I know was Feo distributing the Leezu dress.

Said this I still hope that such FREE hardworkers for people who have no money to throw on a game can cool down and eventually talk it over.
And please... weather you think Feo or Sileny is wrong, DON'T SEND ANY USELESS HATE MAIL!!!!

Alecks Qinan

Anonymous said...

WTF. Grace and dignity seem to be things of the past in favour of temper tauntrums and mud-slinging. Sileny, your comment was totally reasonable and justified -- Feo needs to learn to communicate better if she wasn't intending to mock larger shapes. Like another poster said, she didn't even show the shape's face, just it's backside. Niiiice.

And if you're a fan of Feo, then give her encouragement, don't throw hate-mail around at others. It looks bad on you, it looks bad on her. God save bloggers and creators from their own rabbid fans.

Prudence said...

I think all is well on this side of the world. Sileny did nothing against Feodora, Feo's issues with LeeZu Baxter are for her to deal with. She did wrong by LeeZu, she did wrong by Sileny, and that's that. Wren's blog, and those of us who write with Wren have nothing to do with it, so! On to better stuff like sorting inventory lol.

We haven't a darn thing to do with this hot mess, and we wont so let's get on to talking about LH and what not because that's what we're here for! Thanks Cat, for support Wrenny's blog and supporting Silly's comment.

It's time for cake or something.

Sorrowburn Aeon said...

Feo has a blog? Shows how popular it is to me. -_-

Hopefully she leaves Sileny alone before I have to go and punch her in the mouth with a roll of quarters.

Prudence said...

Sorrow, have my prim babies already. =/

Anonymous said...

Saw a poem once on the 'Net. Goes a lil' somethin' like this...

Go Ahead & Talk About Me,
But I Have Some Advice.
Click Your Heels Together,
And Say 'I Need A Life'.

Don't let the bs get to you. Someone is always gonna hate on the good people. ;-) Keep sticking up for the girls with meat on their bones! And all you girls out there that are not barbie size? Tell them, Don't Hate, APPRECIATE!

Crimson Dagger

Terry Toland said...

Well, I'm a writer for Freebie Telegraph, and I did see the post, and I admit to being at fault for not talking to Feo about better wording it. I was busy with family in another state and had little serious connection.

However, if I can say anything, I highly doubt Feo meant any actual harm and really just chose poor words. To top it off, she has received a bunch of unkind crap from people, having seen some directed towards myself. It's possible that shit mounted and it exploded. And shit-stained glasses are hard to see through.

In addition to talking with Feo, I've also had the opportunity to talk with Wrenja on occasion. And I don't think either of you are bad people. Perhaps it's this damn cold weather that's causing everyone to feel the sting. Whatever the case, I hope we can move forward, whatever paths that may come.

I'm not really going to mention the Leezu thing, as I have no idea about what happened there other than another similar accident we've had happen (not with Feo).

And I guess if you find me insincere, insensitive or ignorant, I'm sorry. I've spent the last 12 or more hours crammed in a truck, and I'm just too tired to be spiteful.

finding the filth said...

holy guacamole. i leave for one day and all hell breaks lose XD

seems like such an unfortunate mess. misunderstandings and over-reactions. none of it needed to be.

ive loved both blogs - and refer to them both daily for the best in affordable content. its sad to see either go down :(

blech - itll be nice to see this damned year finally end XD

on to better days! hugs all around :)

Ashia Tomsen said...

I'ma repost what I said in FT comments. I'm all for fair play, I *hate* the hate and logic always wins for me (yes Vulcan in a better lifetime!) I do not feel that any of what has happened is Sileny's fault, nor should she feel so. Unfortunately, bad timing played a huge part, however, starting war serves no good at all. This was my comment on FT:
First let it be said I like and respect you. However, these dramatics are unbecoming. We spoke a good day before the “Obese shape” post, long before Sileny’s comment and you said then you wanted to stop blogging. I tried my best to talk you out of it, but my opinion is just that in the scheme of things.
I told you what I thought about the LBD issue, and I stand by that. You made a mistake, we all do, we are only human after all. However even you must concede that what happened was due to a lack of common sense and judgment on your part, no matter how well intentioned.
Designers have to have trust in us to do the right thing, and faith we will go to bat for them, and keep their best interests at heart, as well as our readers and group members. Like it or not, we have a responsibility to be honorable. That means, if it looks too good to be true, most likely it is. If something similar happened with one of my skins Feo, my first port of call would be DMCA, no question. And the commentors here who have said it’s Lezu’s problem, because she didn’t check perms, well that just makes me sad. Issues like this happen all the time, and it is *not* the designer’s fault. Rather, place the blame squarely where it should lie, with LL and the ridiculous permissions issues we as designers have to deal with on a daily basis.
I would rather you didn’t stop blogging, but that my friend is your choice. However, if you do stop, own that as your choice,it is not Sileny’s fault, or Lezu’s. We are all grown people here, and I am a firm believer of ownership, over feelings, decisions and life choices. Be real and true to yourself, and please don’t take the easy route (ie, taking a comment to heart and running with it). All that said, the blogasphere would be less without you, remember that."
There is room here for all types of blogs/writers, that is the beauty of SL, it gives all of us a chance to do something we may not be able to in RL. Drama is crap, don't let it be what defines you, it isn't a badge of honor. You do what you do, Feo will do what she does, and there is such a thing as co-existence.Ash out.

Sileny said...

Oh, Ash, you were the one who inspired me to start blogging in the first place...Ty for the comment.

Ashia Tomsen said...

Shit Sillybum, if I can write, anyone can XD! Like I said to you, fair is fair, and what has happened is not fair to you. Wrong place, wrong time, however, none of us would be better off if either of you stopped doing what you clearly do best, and that is blog. I get slated daily, from the size of my lips to the length of my arms (Fo reals!) my writing sux, it doesnt suck enough, you name it, I cop it. Bleh. I love finding new stores and telling people, and you clearly do too. This is a blip, it will blow over srsly. And like I said, not your fault, timing is a funny thing! And never ever feel that you shouldn't speak your mind, you always should stand up for what you believe is right, and good for you having the balls to do so XD!

Wrenja said...

Thank you Aisha for having the nerve to stand up for Sileny, its appreciated by everyone here ^^